A Secret About Your Body, Mama

When I was in college there was a time I obsessed over wanting bigger boobs.  (Psycho) Lindsay Lohan was super popular at the time and I just thought to myself, “I just need them to be a litttttle bigger and then I’ll be happy.”  Thank GOD I knew myself enough to realize I’m about as fickle as they come and didn’t actually go through with anything like a breast augmentation.

In today’s world, as the Kardashian Krew (see what I did there?) infiltrate like, every media outlet possible, having the biggest butt is the newest trend in women’s body types.  But um, can you just take a moment to re-read that last sentence?  Our freaking bodies, the sacred shell that houses our thoughts, beliefs, aspirations, and dreams have been hijacked by the media only to be used as a means to peddle the latest fashion trends.  (Woah, I sound like a totally hippie feminist.  Hell yea.)  You HAVE to look at this site that goes into detail about how the “perfect female body” has evolved in the past century.  We have to stop letting other entities tell us what our bodies should look like.  We have to reject the idea that our bodies are up for grabs by marketing executives that prey on our insecurities.

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How I Rocked My Hawaii Trip With My Kids

It was NOT supposed to go down like this. Not at all. A milllllion percent not what I had envisioned for myself and my kids. Hawaii. It’s supposed to be paradise, right? Try jumping on a plane and heading to Maui literally two days after you have served your spouse divorce papers. Yea, not a very cheerful experience. Now, you may be sitting there thinking to yourself, “Why even GO!? I would rather just stay home!” And you know what friends, I did contemplate that. I did consider staying home to avoid the pain that was the death of my fantasy vacation. But then a couple things started jangling around in this head of mine.

“You have been telling your kids you’re going to Hawaii for months. Their mom should be there with them.”

“Hey, guess who helped pay for the airline tickets and the room? Uh, you. You worked your ass off for this.”

“Even though it isn’t what you thought it was going to be…you can still have fun.”

“Hey Emily, you DESERVE this.”

So I went, guys. I freaking went to Hawaii with my husband that I’m splitting from and my two small children and I’m here to tell you I survived. And if I’m being honest, I didn’t just survive. I had such joyful and beautiful moments during this trip that I feel strengthened as a mom, woman, and human being.

Did I cry a few times? Yes. Did I experience wicked self doubt? Oh yes. But I stopped and I breathed, I reflected on a few of my mantras, and I remembered that I’m strong and capable and I have so much to be grateful for. And then I pushed on, mamas.

For anyone that experiences anxiety, you’ll know going to new places can make you feel uncomfortable. And I’m sure some of you reading this know that can be an understatement! Add on being solely responsible for young children and it takes it to a whole other level. It can make you want to stay right in your bubble. You may tell yourself you can’t leave the safety and comfort of your house, or your hotel room, or your routine for fear of losing control. I get you, mama. But pop the damn bubble and go. You just gotta do it. Continue reading “How I Rocked My Hawaii Trip With My Kids”

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5 Things You NEED to STOP Saying to Empower Yourself, Mama!

This post contains a few affiliate links.  Please know I would never recommend a service or product that I do not love and personally use!  You can check out my disclosure page if you have any questions or concerns.  

Yo I’m Emily, I’m 30, and I’m going through some roughhhh times.  I’m fighting a lot of nasty head noise these days, but I’m doing my best to empower myself and come out of my situation stronger than ever.  I’m doing everything I can to show up, be present, and spread positivity to myself and those around me (especially to the awesome mamas out there that are working hard and holding it down!).  I’ve found that there are some ideas that have been floating around in my head for awhile that are not healthy and are actually holding me back as a woman.  I’ve made the decision to consciously remove them from my brain. Here are five things we need to give up in our vocabulary, ladies.

I just need ________________ and then I’ll be happy.  I need to lose weight, I need to be better about getting to the gym, I need more friends, I need to make more money, I need my skin to clear up, I need this man to make me feel special, I need to have this many likes on social media… The list could go on and ON.  No. NOOOOO.  You don’t need ANY of that shit to be happy.  Lemme say that again for the people in the back: YOU DO NOT NEED EXTRINSIC THINGS IN ORDER TO BE HAPPY.  Okay, I’m going to say something truly cliche and you may wanna punch me… You guys, happiness comes from inside your own brain.  Truly.  I read this AMAZING AF article that was originally published by The Cut that centered on an extremely popular course at Yale.  The class is alllll about how to be happy.  Seriously.  A course designated to help people legitimately learn what happiness is and effective strategies for how to obtain happiness.  I read this article like, every week to remind myself of its merits!!  I’m not kidding. Continue reading “5 Things You NEED to STOP Saying to Empower Yourself, Mama!”

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My #1 Exercise to Push Through Tough Times & Empower Myself to Get On With My Day

I’m in a weird spot friends.  I’ve made the crazy painful and difficult decision that I need to end my marriage.  At times I feel SO insanely overwhelmed with the fact that my life is going to be dramatically changing during the course of this next year.  I freakkkk out when I think about Christmas (check out this post here to see how I am dealing with my holiday season fears), my kids having two different households, and what it will mean for me to be single woman in this crazy ass world. (Omg deep breaths)  Continue reading “My #1 Exercise to Push Through Tough Times & Empower Myself to Get On With My Day”

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Empower Yourself By Getting Ready for the Holidays…in JULY

I have a confession… I am not a Christmas kind of person.  Don’t leave!  It’s just that I get super overwhelmed thinking I have to participate in every traditional Christmas experience that goes along with the holiday:  making cookies, putting up the lights and tree, adding decorations around the house and outside, gifts for teachers, gifts for neighbors, gifts for this and that extended family member, caroling, family Christmas cards to send out (Omg am I even going to send those out this year!?)… The list goes on and on and I’m sure I’ve barely scraped the surface knowing all of you Christmas fanatics out there.

This year, I expect my holiday season to look very, very different.  Extremely different.  As a woman going through the initial stages of divorce, when I think about the holidays I want to ask for a rain check and go to sleep for like a million years.  When I first realized that my marriage was over and I was going to proceed with divorce, I literally sobbed thinking about Christmas.  HOW the HELL would I do this!?  Continue reading “Empower Yourself By Getting Ready for the Holidays…in JULY”

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The Journey that Led Me to Empower Other Women

The Fall Out

It was brought to my attention that my husband was involved with another woman.  Again.  Third time.  But this time was different.  This time, it was the same woman from the time before, and things had progressed from text messages and occasional phone calls to crossing the line into the physical.

Prior to the discovery that his affair had turned physical, I never considered leaving my husband.  I’m not kidding when I say that had maintained and cultivated a vision for myself since I was in high school: I wanted a gorgeous husband, a beautiful house, a career, and healthy, well-adjusted children.  I wanted it all.  And I busted my ASS to make it happen for myself.  My kids are freaking awesome, my house is gorgeous, and I love my job.  However, that part with the husband didn’t stick.  After about a week of observing my husband’s actions, and reflecting on my own emotions, and analyzing our fractured relationship I realized that the vision I had had for myself since I was a young girl was over.   Continue reading “The Journey that Led Me to Empower Other Women”

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